Understanding Your Options as a Grandparent
Are you a grandparent and you’re trying to get custody of your grandchild? I’m family law attorney Carl Birkhead with Wirth Law Office in Tulsa, Oklahoma. I’ve been practicing family and criminal law for about seven years now, and I want to help you make law easy by talking a little bit about when and how you can get custody of a child.
The short version is you can’t get custody. That’s not the word that we use. In a grandparental situation, you’re looking at either an adoption or a guardianship, and that depends upon what the circumstances justify. So let’s say just hypothetically you’re trying to get guardianship of your granddaughter because the parents are just not around.
They’re doing drugs. Maybe they’re in jail. I don’t know. But someone needs to care for that child immediately, and no one else can do it. In that instance, you’re going to be looking at guardianship, and this is usually where these cases start guardianship, either formally, legally with the court, or informally with the parents just leaving your grandkid with you, which happens a lot.
Steps to Obtain Guardianship
So you file for guardianship. Let’s say it’s something where the parents just very suddenly dropped out and you need to get in on an emergency basis. That’s how the case will start, and ultimately you get guardianship of your grandchild that way. Technically you have custody, but you don’t have any parental rights.
You’re stepping in to act as the parent, but mom and dad’s rights as the parents are still very much intact. They still have the right to inherit. They still have the right to visitation. In a way that’s safe and appropriate, they still have the duties of a parent, like to pay child support and things like that.
When Adoption Becomes an Option
But let’s say you’ve had your grandkids for a hot minute, and it doesn’t look like it’s going to change anytime soon. If for 12 out of 14 months before bringing it to the court, the parents have failed to establish and maintain a positive relationship with the child or failed to support the child, you can move to terminate those parents’ rights and do an actual adoption as the grandparents.
That would vest you with full parental authority. You would no longer be, in a legal sense I’m not talking about biology, you would no longer be that child’s grandparent. You would in every way be that child’s parent from a legal standpoint. I see cases like that happen all the time.
Emotional Aspects and Legal Realities
And sometimes, more often than not, the parents will either not show up to court or they’ll consent to the adoption, either because they don’t want to have to pay child support anymore or because they genuinely believe that that’s what is best for their child. Regardless of the reasons, that’s typically how those things play out.
It’s a little heartbreaking to see, but at the same time, it’s a little bit joyful too because it’s great to see somebody wanting to step up and take care of these kids if the situation shows that the biological parents either can’t or won’t do that. Unfortunately, that happens way more often than I thought before I started doing this.
And it makes me thankful to at least see that there’s an avenue where grandparents can step in and make sure those children are taken care of. If you have questions about this, if you’re looking at your familial situation and you’re wondering if this is the right move, give us a call. I’m more than happy to talk with you about it.
Schedule Your Low-Cost Initial Strategy Session
I’m more than happy to discuss the ins and outs with you and figure out when, if, or how this is something that you need to look at starting. My name is Carl Birkhead. I’m with Wirth Law Office. And I want to help you make law easy. Thank you. Call us today at 918-879-1681 to schedule your low-cost initial strategy session.
